Hello, worries.

It seems like good feelings don't come without fear of losing them (for me at least). The closer we become, the more scared I am. Of losing it all. It would be so easy for you to walk away, for things to end today.
I feel more scared this time, and it gets worse as the weeks progress. But the weeks have progressed, the months, even, and you are still around.
It may not be healthy, but for me, it never is.
I'm not going to get "normal" here.

I would like reassurance. That you will still be there for me tomorrow. But I can't ask for reassurance, because your answer could be a lie. Or your answer could be no.

I would like to not be a secret. But this doesn't matter. It is what it is, there is no changing our circumstances.

I would like more time with you. Now, and in the future. I'm scared to let you in, scared to be vulnerable. Letting a person in takes time with me. I hope you have patience.

None of this changes the fact that you make me feel happy, and safe, and appreciated. Respected and cared for. Not many guys do that for me. So much as been superficial flattery. It isn't like that here. Won't you grow bored with me soon? That is what worries me.


Now, I also miss you. I fear that my feelings are greater than yours.